Title: Impertinent Questions
Author: ML
First posted: Nov 22, 2009
Archive: just let me know where
Spoiler / Episode Reference: Conduit
Rating: Bad words and some impure thoughts. Not for the kiddies.
Disclaimer: I still don’t own them, darn it, just the action figures. But I’m grateful to Chris Carter, 1013, and Fox, not to mention all the actors, for bringing these characters to life and giving me so much enjoyment.
Acknowledgments: to the Posse, always.
Author’s notes: This is the fourth story in an exploration of the early seasons. They are loosely tied together but can be read as standalones as well.
Synopsis: …you ask an impertinent question and you’re on your way to a pertinent answer. Or not.
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Impertinent Questions by ML
Cryptography Division, FBI
“Whatcha workin’ on there, Danny?”
A heavy hand fell on his shoulder and he caught a whiff of stale cigarettes emanating from the suit jacket of his questioner.
It’s Agent Bernstein to you, Danny muttered under his breath. Aloud, he said, “Holtzman. What can we do for you that your own Cryptography Division can’t?”
Besides, you know, actually deciphering something, he thought.
One of these days he was going to say something like that out loud and get his ass fired.
“I hear you got some interesting data from one of your field agents,” Holtzman said jovially. “I need to know where it came from.”
Danny remained silent. If this was a fishing expedition, he’d have to do better than that.
“Don’t make me go to Blevins. Or Skinner,” Holtzman said in the same pleasantly threatening tone.
“I need a little more information,” Danny finally replied. “We get a lot of data through here every day. Out of the thousands and thousands of possibilities, which one caught your attention?”
“We got a tip from the Sioux City office,” Holtzman replied. “Who’s investigating a missing person case there?”
He’d already known it had to be Mulder, and Holtzman probably had already known too. Nothing seemed to set alarms off faster than if word got around Mulder was investigating something. He might as well have a hotline to the NSA.
Those Redskins tickets better be good.
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Sioux City, Iowa
“This is the place,” Saunders said. “The Stay ‘n Save.”
“Those FBI guys really know how to live large,” Holtzman said.
Saunders parked the car by the office and went in to talk to the night clerk. Holtzman watched as Saunders showed his ID and got the room numbers from the clerk.
“You owe me ten bucks,” Saunders said as he came back to the car. “They’re in separate rooms.”
“Of course they’d rent separate rooms,” Holtzman said. “Mulder may be crazy, but he’s not stupid.”
“So which room?” Saunders asked. “Double or nothing.”
“You’re on. I’ll take one-ten,” Holtzman decided.
Not bothering to use much caution, Saunders and three other agents tried the door of Room 108 while Holtzman and Jacobs banged on the door of Room 110. Without giving either occupant time to answer, they applied shoulders to their respective doors and pushed. The flimsy doors gave way with very little resistance.
Agent Scully stood frozen in the flashlight’s beam. A quick sweep of the room by one of the other agents revealed that her gun was on the dresser, several steps out of reach. No one else was in the room that Saunders could see. The door to the bathroom stood open and the window was high, tiny, and closed. If Mulder wasn’t hiding under the bed, he’d won the bet.
“Who are you?” Scully yelled, possibly to alert Mulder to the intruders.
“NSA, Agent Scully,” Saunders said, flashing his badge. “Where’s Agent Mulder?”
Scully looked carefully at the ID. Her demeanor changed from frightened woman to furious. “I assume he’s in his room,” she said icily, standing very straight next to her bed. Saunders watched her eyes flash over to the dresser where her gun and badge lay. “May I ask why you had to break into my room at this hour?”
“National security, Agent Scully,” Saunders said, raking his flashlight over her. Who knew for sure if the rumors were true, but if Mulder wasn’t banging his partner he must be blind or gay.
“I’m sure there must be some mistake,” Agent Scully said. “The case we’re on has nothing to do with national security.”
“We’ll be the judge of that,” one of the other NSA agents said. “What do you now about the data Agent Mulder sent to Cryptography?”
“Excuse me,” Agent Scully said. “I’m going to go get dressed.” She snatched her suitcase and darted into the bathroom, slamming the door after her.
The other agents looked at Saunders for guidance. One took a couple of steps toward the bathroom door, and Saunders shook his head slightly. Agent Scully was not as easily intimidated as they thought she’d be.
“We could break down the door,” another agent suggested. “Her gun’s out here.”
“What if she has one in her case?” Saunders asked. “Anyway, she’s not going anywhere.”
It was now obvious to Saunders that bullying and threatening were not likely to gain them any ground with Agent Scully; time to try another tack.
Moments later, Agent Scully emerged from the bathroom, fully dressed. She walked right up to Saunders and looked him in the eye.
“Now,” she said in a clipped tone. “What is it you’re looking for? And why did you break in here to ask me where Agent Mulder is?”
One of the agents behind him snickered and Scully turned a laser-beam glare in his direction.
The room went silent. One of the agents cleared his throat and shifted position.
“You guys get the hell out of here,” Saunders said, jerking his head toward the door.
Scully stood silently as the agents shuffled out of the room, closing the door almost all the way.
Saunders tried again. He would not, could not, apologize, or Holtzman would have his ass. But he could change his tone a little.
“Agent Scully, we need your help determining the source of the data Agent Mulder sent to Cryptography. It is a matter of national security, and that’s all I can say.”
Agent Scully stood, obviously waiting for something more.
“We’re just looking for a little inter-agency cooperation here,” he said, knowing that ship had already sailed, but giving it a try anyway.
Scully still didn’t speak but one eyebrow was raised dangerously high.
After a long moment, she said, “Very well. Here’s the address.” She wrote it on a piece of motel stationery and handed it to him. “Now, I’m going to see Agent Mulder. In his room. Do you have any objection?”
Saunders handed the address to one of the other agents, who had already dialed Holtzman’s number.
“Go right ahead,” Saunders said, now on firmer ground. “I’m sure he’s in his room, just as you said.”
Scully gave him one last long look before picking up her gun, badge, and phone, and marching out of the room.
He watched her go, shoulders squared, ready for whatever battle awaited her down the hall. She passed Holtzman and ignored him completely. Holtzman stopped and watched her march past before turning back to Saunders.
“You have any trouble?” Holtzman asked him.
“Nah,” Saunders said. “You?”
“Mulder gave me some lip,” Holtzman said, “but we took care of that.”
Saunders grunted. He knew Mulder’s passive-aggressive tactics. He wondered if he got away with it with his partner.
“So,” Holtzman added once they were in the car. “You think they’re doing it?”
“If you’re so interested, why don’t you ask them?” Saunders countered.
“Hey, you’re the guy who said double or nothing,” said Holtzman. “Are they?”
“I don’t think so. And I’m tired of this game. Don’t we have an investigation to conduct?”
“Whatever, Saunders,” Holtzman said. “Since when are you afraid of an FBI agent? I thought you said she didn’t give you any trouble.”
“She cooperated where it counts, which I bet Mulder didn’t do,” Saunders said. “She’s a professional.”
“I think you’re full of shit,” Holtzman replied. “I think they are and you just don’t want to lose the bet.”
“Next time you have to come beat up Mulder, you go ahead and ask her,” Saunders said. “But make sure she doesn’t have her gun on her.”
“You are afraid of her,” Holtzman shook his head. “You’re afraid of that tiny little –”
“Shut the hell up, Holtzman.”
-end-
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Author’s notes:
Why break into Scully’s room looking for Mulder if they haven’t already checked his?
“Danny,” the guy Mulder and Scully both seem to rely on for a myriad of things, never had a last name on the show, but according to the X Files Wiki, Bernstein is likely:
http://x-files.wikia.com/wiki/Daniel_Bernstein